I am so proud of you for coming to the Bath Boutique Studio for a photoshoot! What an amazing gift to yourself. Many women report feeling confident and inspired when they leave the boudoir studio. This is such a powerful feeling!
Ultimately, I want you to walk away from your boudoir photoshoot experience with more than just a fleeting moment of empowerment. I want you to live every single day of your life with confidence and joy. Sometimes you may be tempted to fall into negative habits of thinking, feeling, and talking about yourself or your body. But you can choose confidence and positivity instead. And when you do, you will change the world.
This guide includes a few tips and tools to help you maintain the confidence from your session for as long as possible -- or at least enough to tide you over until your next photoshoot!
You did something important by investing in yourself and your unique beauty. I absoutely loved having you at the studio! I want you to always remember that.
YOU ARE WORTH IT!
TIP 1. PAY ATTENTION.
The first step is simply to just pay attention. Listen to the way you talk to yourself. Listen to the way you think about other women and other bodies. Initially, you don't have to take any action, just simply become more aware of how you feel, think, and react to the world around you. Before you can move forward, you have to know where you are starting from!
ACTION: For the next week, tally how often you say negative things to yourself or about yourself. Take note of any negative things you say about your body or your actions. This includes self deprecating humor! Focus on how you think and talk about other people and other bodies. Just start to pay attention and take note. Do you treat yourself with kindness? Is your self-talk positive or negative?
TIP 2. BE PRESENT.
Being present in the moment is key to feeling empowered. One of the reasons you may have felt so "high" after your boudoir session is because you spent the entire time focused and present. Being present means enjoying the present moment and not allowing your mind to travel to the past or to the future. Being present allows us to be grateful for what we have right now. When we are present, it is harder for negative thoughts to take over.
ACTION: Purposely engage in activities that encourage present thinking such as meditation or journaling. Spend more time doing things that you love. Brainstorm activities that you enjoyed when you were a child and try picking something up again. Look up mindfulness meditations on YouTube. Spend time outdoors. Write in a gratitude journal.
TIP 3. WHO ARE YOU FOLLOWING ON SOCIAL MEDIA?
Rumor has it that your life is most influenced by the 5 people that you spend the most time with. This includes IRL and online! Take a look at the social media accounts that you follow and be honest with yourself: Do they make you feel worse? Do you feel jealous? Bitter? Angry? Sad? Consider the same questions for the people you surround yourself with. If everyone in your circle is negative, you will likely be the same. If everyone in your circle loves to complain and talk about other people, you do the same. Consider who you want to be, who you want to give your power and energy to, and who might be having more of an effect on you than you think!
ACTION: This week scroll through your Instagram and Facebook feeds and unfollow 5 accounts that no longer serve you.
TIP 4. LOOK AT YOURSELF NAKED.
This one might seem a bit counterintuitive at first, but looking at your naked body from head to toe will do wonders for helping you to ACCEPT what your body IS. Many times what we consider to be BAD about our bodies is just currently uncomfortable. We have been taught that if certain parts don't look like other people that means they are automatically bad - THIS IS WRONG INFO. Our body parts might be different than the ones shown in the media, but it doesn't mean they are bad - it just means they are different. Looking at your body naked will help you create a better relationship with your body. This may be difficult at first, but you can change your negative thoughts into positive ones. Over time, you CAN develop a positive relationship with your body!
ACTION: Set a timer for 2 minutes and look at your whole naked body in the mirror. For a few weeks, record your immediate thoughts on paper (even if they are negative thoughts). Look at your thoughts and get curious about them. Ask yourself: "Who taught me to think like this?" "Where did I learn this?" "Is this thought helping me be the best version of myself?" "Do I want to keep thinking this thought about my body?"
TIP 5. AIM FOR LIBERATION.
There is so much talk these days about self LOVE and body POSITIVITY, but we seemed to have jumped right over body neutrality or liberation. Body positivity says, "I love my body no matter what!" In contrast, body liberation says, "I may not love how my body looks today, but that's not going to stop me from doing the things I want to do." Not a fan of your tum today, but really want to dance? Body liberation says, "Go for it!" Your body exists to serve your life and not the other way around! Some days you won't like your body and that's absolutely okay! You won't undo 25, 35 or 45 years of thinking with one photoshoot or one bubble bath or a few kind words. But body liberation means living a fabulous life, no matter what your body looks like. Your body should never be the thing that stops you from living your best life - she'll be along for the ride no matter what!
ACTION: The next time you want to do something, wear something or be something but you have thoughts like, "I can't do that because of my [insert body part]. ." try saying instead: "My body allows me to do many fabulous things! I CAN do X activity and Y body part will not interfere with my joy!"